ADHD breakups: Impulsive texts and overthinking regrets

Sometimes, romantic relationships just don’t work out. And breaking up with someone can be really tough — including having the breakup conversation. With ADHD, overthinking, people-pleasing, and rejection sensitivity can make it even harder.

This week, ADHD coach and author of I Don’t Hate My Ex-Husband Jess DuBose visits Sorry, I Missed This. Listen to learn how to check in with yourself about your relationship, and some tips to help you through a breakup conversation.

Related resources

ADHD and rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD)Jess’ website, jessdubose.comI Don’t Hate My Ex-Husband by Jess DuBoseNational Domestic Violence HotlineRainn.org

Timestamps

(02:08) Why did Jess write her book?

(04:13) How does ADHD impact breaking up?

(05:19) Staying in a relationship because of people-pleasing

(07:42) Jess’ growth process: ASPIRE

(10:22) Guided meditation exercise about whether or not to break up with someone

(14:08) What can help you through a breakup

(19:32) Initiating the conversation to end a relationship

(24:10) How to avoid the impulse to backpedal during the breakup conversation

(27:37) Jess’ parting advice

(29:14) Where you can find Jess

To get a transcript of this show and check out more episodes, visit the Sorry, I Missed This podcast page at Understood.org.

We love hearing from our listeners. Email us at sorryimissedthis@understood.org.

Understood.org is a nonprofit organization dedicated to empowering people with learning and thinking differences, like ADHD and dyslexia. If you want to help us continue this work, donate at understood.org/give

It can be hard to navigate relationships when you have ADHD. Host Cate Osborn has ADHD, a background in sex education, and a whole lot of questions like “How do I know what I want out of a relationship? How do I remember my friends exist? What can I do to handle conflict better?”

Tune in to Sorry, I Missed This to learn about topics like social skills, boundaries, communication, intimacy, and sex. Join Cate in unpacking the taboo, painful, and often hilarious challenges of being in a relationship when you have ADHD.

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